Rememberence

Monday, 29 May 2006 23:35
sinefergusson: (Default)
For most people in the U.S. its one more day off for a 3 day weekend. I used to think that way, up until a few years ago. I got to spend the day with my boyfriend, we went to morning Memorial service that honoured our veterans. Elias(my boyfriend) spent 12 years in the Army 5 of those in Germany. I think of my Grandfather who served in WWII, my Father who served in Vietnam, "Black Fox"(currently serving) & Jon-Jon(served) as Marines(Semper Fi) and others who have served in the Army, National Guard and Navy.

I want to say Thank You. Thank you for defending our country, for doing what most only wish they could do. To me you all are the heroes that we need to look up to.

Now that I have got that off my chest I need to vent on this part.

My life has been up an down and up again only to go down. I lost my job last week and started to do the temp work again. Well I had already made the plans to come to Bozeman to see Elias and now to know my Meg is here as well. She's back in school to get a degree in accounting. Between talking to her and Elias, along with being sick and tired of not having a direction in my life I'm going to go to college. Its jump seeing as I have not been in school since 1998. But I am nervous, nervous about leaving home again. I'm scared of what recriminations I'm going to get when I get home to mom and dad.

See I turned down a temp job to stay over another day to start the process to see if I can get into school. I know when I get home I'm going to hear about it from them. Hear how I'm just fucking off and how I need to buck up and just do what I need to get a job and stick with it. I just hate having my parents on me it tears me up so much that I end up in tears. I'm such a goober when it comes to that I know.

Tonight Elias and I will talk some more about this and what I will do between now and the end of August. I talked to my friends Ath & Shauna and both are super supportive of me on this. Shauna even said I could bunk up at her place once more till I have to get to Bozeman if my parents get to be abit over bearing on me on this.

So wish me luck, I hope I can do this and make my life better. So far, things are looking up.

Time

Thursday, 16 February 2006 21:53
sinefergusson: (B&W)
You know time has a funny way of messing with you. I have been doing so much in the last six months. I went to PA for Pennsic War, I come back and end up doing a temp job. Told this job was only goin to pay about $7.50/hr when I had told the temp agency that I would not go for less than $8 but I could not pass up making money when I was broker than broke. The job went for a few days, to a week then 5 weeks. It was after that, that I was told they where going to hire me peramently. I was floored and happy. See prior to all that I was told that I was not going to be hired. They where not what they where looking for and I was cool with that. I was still looking and I was just glad I could get money. But time would tell I would keep my job and now I'm still there an loving it.

Those who are reading this are probably wondering what the hell am I going on about. Well one its my space to do with what I want...and two, to point out that what I named my subject is relevant to what I'm rambling on about.

Time for once is being kind to me. I thought it would hurt me in the end. Time is all that someone needs to clear their head, to think and space to breath. I seem to forget that bit of wisdom when it comes to those close to me. I forget they need time to themselves and not have the time to answer every lil thing or what not. I hope I will learn in time that not everything my friends do is meant to hurt but to help them.

I guess I need to learn to have the patients to learn and the time to understand it.

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